World Goes On

Download World Goes On (feat. Bruno Mars) - David Guetta

David Guetta releases yet another fucking mindblowing song, and though it may not be an optimal DP tune, it is sure to get the party started. Whenever I hear it I cannot help but think back to the scene in American Wedding when Stifler has the dance off with the gay bear, which is possibly the greatest scene in any movie. Guetta has always had the ability to tune into women's minds and get them in the mood through his music, and World Goes On is no different. The combination of the piano and electronica to start off the song is phenomenal, and Bruno Mars has an out of this world voice. It was a fucking joke, Mars - out of this world, I'm clever I already fucking know. This shit gets me hot, just like watching Tiger Woods hug his father, the late Earl Woods, after winning the '97 Masters. It brings me to tears every time I watch it. You better not bullshit me about how he is a bad husband and all that, he is a fucking boss who went through some though times. And in those though times he banged an unbelievable amount of chicks, bravo Tiger. I hope Andy North devotes all of his talking time during the Masters to Tiger, because it would probably do him good considering he wouldn't have to try to make up stuff and pretend he knows a fucking thing about golf. Good luck Tiger, we are all behind you.

The Golden Days

Download Still the Hottest (feat. J. Cole) - Young Chris

I don't really know what it is about this song, but it brings me back to the good old days, where people actually thought that dude Fonzie was a cool guy, now I would hardly even consider him a legitimate human being. Anyone who fucking thinks the thumbs up is that cool a gesture is surely mistaken, luckily Rocket Power learned from the mistake and invented the Woogity Woogity, fucking genius. And that isn't even the best of it, shoobie is an insult everybody should have in their arsenal, you don't have to know what it means, just tell people it's the cool way to say faggot. Back to the glory days, aka 1960-1685 (roughly), this was what most historians would consider America's Golden Age. It all began when Neil Diamonds uttered those words Sweet Caroline, and we fucking took off from there. I would give just as much credit to whoever inserted the dun dun dun and so good, so good, so good in the chorus, because that's what really gets everybody into it, I get jacked out of my mind just thinking about it (a quote from Fred Claus, a great fucking movie.) Old people talk about how bad of times these decades were, but any time you can get fucked up on acid with all your buds and know that it doesn't matter because all the cops in the station you just drove by are also probably getting fucked up, you've hit the jackpot. Add that to the introduction of Monday Night Football, what more could you ask for. Sure Vietnam probably fucking sucked, but I didn't have to deal with it so I don't give a shit. We are the smart ones, coming after the shitstorm and yet still experiencing the times by embracing all the the good things that came out of it. Fucking rock and roll.

Weezy Doesn't Have the Cup

Download Carter Chronicles

Though I may not be a fan of Lil Wayne, I know the large majority of the white, private school kids of the world still praise him because, as I have said, white people think everything black people do is cool. So here it is, the newest Carter Chronicles, your probably getting amped at this point because you favorite black person in the world aka Weezy has released yet another incoherent mixtape that you can blast in your car so everybody looks at you, fucking sluts. Forget about that, there are more important matters to be discussed, the fucking Mennen Cup. Now if you don't know what the Mennen Cup is then go turn on your TV and watch Women's PBA bowling you pussy, because you don't belong here. After the '09 boys brought us the Cup last year, we have all been thirsting for another taste. But this year we knew it wouldn't come easy, we would have to be even more obnoxious and inappropriate then in years past. Do I care that the ref could potentially penalize us if I make an inappropriate comment directed at him? No, so I'm gonna tell him that he has ED, because I don't give a fuck and it's his fault he can't get it up. His wife is probably on youporn fucking Lex Steele because her joke of a husband can't get lead in his pencil. Fucking loser. But it's not just about insults, chanting is one of the greatest inventions known to man. Chanting at an opposing playing that "Your a PUSSY" is sure to turn heads, and probably embarrass him a bit. Since we all know fans can't be on the ice to throw a right hook at #21 who looks like he wants to toss a Crimson puck players salad, the second best thing to do is yell at him. We all know this same kid loves to go mud-sliding with that Puerto Rican creep who mows his lawn, so fucking tell him. Another fucking loser, game over, you win.

We Love Rap Music

Download Realer Than You Think (feat. Jadakiss) - King Phaze

In case you haven't caught onto the subtle hits in the last two posts, I happen to love America. But being a white kid from a private school, there something else I love that goes without question, rap music. I really have no idea why we private school kids love it so much, because I personally don't know what the fuck they are saying in the songs but I listen anyways. If I really had to pick a reason for it, I would say it's because white people think that everything black people do is cool, except saying the n word, because that shit will get you shot. So if one black guy is gonna blast rap music, you are bound to find every white person is going to do the exact same. Even if you don't like rap music, if a black person asks you what you think about it, you have to say yes. Saying no is called racism and that's a subject I think we all want to avoid because unlike the n word, it will legitimately get you shot. Thinking back to the last time I was in the city, dressed up real fancy, I was walking with a group of friends and I remember a black guy walked straight at us on the sidewalk. Now this sidewalk wasn't big enough for us all to walk comfortable, so somebody had to move. Your probably asking who moved. Chill the fuck out I was gonna answer anyways, like the red sea me and my friends ran out of the way like this guy was the asian who shot up VT, that motherfucker. Why did we all move? Well this guy was probably 6'5, 250 and black. That's fucking why.

Sean Brown/America

Download Red Button (feat. Mike Posner)

Download We Made It (feat. Late Bloomers)

After watching America run shit against Canada in the Olympics/write the last post, I have decided to talk about my love for the land of the free and the home of the brave, otherwise known as the Promised Land (I don't know what the fuck the jews are talking about this is the real promised land.) Nothing makes me more angry then some low life immigrant talking about how much they love their old country and how everybody else hates America. Well if you don't love it here, get the fuck out, I know I don't want you here and neither does George Washington, the greatest war leader to walk the earth. And since he was the greatest leader on earth, that makes America the greatest country on earth, which gives us the right to do whatever we fucking feel like with it. The idea that America's pollution is destroying the ozone layer faster then all other countries is about as true as the children's' stories I used to read, and if you can prove to me that Humpty Dumpty, the fucking egg, actually fell off that wall, then I might even listen to you. Global warming means summer, and if you don't want to be able to go to the beach year round then I would go as far as saying you hate America. You deserve to be locked up in Guantanamo Bay with the rest of the fucking arabs who hate America, therefore who also hate summer. Don't forget that the larger the carbon footprint, the longer we will be remembered for, and I sure as hell don't want to end up like Mark Hamill (Luke Skywalker, what the fuck happened to him, I know).

Tinchy Stryder is Number One

Download Number One (feat. N-Dubz)

Download I Will Never Leave

Download Take Me Back

Download You're Not Alone

Hip-Hop artist Tinchy Stryder is looking to be the first positive thing to come out of Britain since The Beatles, and I think they were the only good thing to ever emerge from that shit hole of a country. I still cannot figure out how England could possibly manage to be so bad, and if it wasn't for Premier League play and Strawberry Fields Forever, which I am yet to figure out what the fuck they are singing about, I would not even consider it a nation at all. It is sorta amusing how much better America is, and we Americans should take every opportunity to tell those English bastards. If you happen to see a English guy walking, keep in mind he's probably drunk because all brits are lightweight pussies, bombard him with insults as personal as possible. Everybody knows the English have the worst set of teeth, so inform him that America has far superior technology and had invented the braces. Don't worry if he doesn't know what your talking about, they are the dumbest people alive, it's not your fault. You put him in his place, advantage America.

You Know Big Sean

Download Paper Chaser

Big Sean is finally looking to hit the big stage of the rap world, much like Danica Patrick has been trying to hit the big time of either racing or porn, I haven't figured that one out yet. But the only difference is, Danica is trying to get famous racing cars, I don't know what the fuck shes thinking. Oldest fact known to man: women can't drive for shit. Watching Danica Patrick attempt to drive a race car is almost as frustrating as listening to Pam Ward run the play by play for any give NCAA football game, why does she believe she knows anything about football? There is nothing worse then a woman thinking she knows more about sports than I do. Luckily Erin Andrews makes up for all the dykes in sportscasting, because she knows she was hired for that body, not for her football IQ. Anyways, my point is that Danica has no chance, but for Big Sean the future is looking pretty promising. Give this a listen and you will see what I mean.

I live my Life major

Bad Behaviour by Tiesto featuring Dizzee Rascal in his new album Kaleidoscope has now hit the map. His key words "Livin it major with a bad behavior"- is now said throughout the halls. I think about this song as I stroll the back alleys of morristown with my "wanka out cause I am doing it loosie "- At this moment, I generally try to pump the iron fist with the mud lady as she lathers herself with mud, tanning oil, and other beauty enhancements. Also, This song can also be used at the classic party. When the lights go off and the dp starts rolling, the woman truly find that this song makes them dance erotically. Call the Pit Boss. This shit just got real.

In memory of Chi, Dupes, The Ipod King, and that other guy I never really liked...09 I'm Out 09

Addicted To Money

Download Addicted to Money

It sounds like every other black rap group that's ever made a freestyle song but it catches on if you can survive the first minute of the same black dude yelling "I'm addicted to money," yeah I bet you are addicted to money, and I would also put money that you take 50 Cent's album "Get Rich or Die Trying" as a life lesson. Because of that your sitting in a jail cell carving chess pieces like Andy Dufresne for trying to rob a 7 Eleven and getting arrested, you really fucked that one up. You didn't get rich and in the attempt you didn't even die, good work there. This is pure speculation though, this guy could be sitting in his Beverly Hills mansion right now thinking to himself "who's laughing now?" If this were the case you would be, but I would still make the bet your wasting your life away in Rikers Island.

You Can't See Me

Download My Time Is Now

The only thing I can think of that gets me hotter then watching John Cena pull the famous 5 Knuckle Shuffle on Triple H during Monday Night Raw is seeing the same man come out to his own entrance music. This has never been heard of, it's like watching Carlton Banks dance to his own rendition of "It's Not Unusual" back on the Fresh Prince, because that would indeed be very unusual to see. For the most part Cena is seen a very two dimension, a world class WWE wrestler and a blockbuster movie actor (don't pretend you haven't seen the marine, everybody has.) But the Chain-gang Soldier has another talent hidden deep in his armoire, he is quite the rapper. Allow him to serenade you with his lyrics, but remember that you can't actually see him.

The Sky's the Limit for Jason Derulo

Download Sky's the Limit

Download Love Hangover

Just weeks before the release of his debut album, Jason Derulo leaks, what in my opinion, is his best song to date. Cooling down after the hype ended following his first single, Watcha Say, Derulo has begun to look more deeply into his singing career. Though his music may sound inspired by many artists before him, he is beginning to resemble the great Chris Brown more than any others. You can complain about how Chris Brown beat the shit out of Rihanna, but lets be honest with eachother here, we all still listen to and love him because he makes great music. You're all probably going to whine about domestic violence against women, but if you weren't going nuts when Snookie got her shit rocked with the punch to the face then you belong in some 3rd world country where you would never even imagine getting a job mowing a lawn here in America. It may seem a bit ridiculous, but we all love celebrities, no matter what they do wrong. Are you honestly going to tell me you hate Michael Jackson because he molested those little kids? Yeah I do, but he produces great music none the less. The feeling everybody gets when first hearing Man In the Mirror is something you will never forget, its like the first time your friend showed you Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition back in the 3rd grade. Alright, maybe its not the same feeling exactly but you get the point.